Learning what is reasonable...
I think that a vital piece of becoming unstuck is learning what is reasonable. What I mean is that, as persons with AD/HD, there are limits to what we should expect to accomplish in a day.
I am always struggling with the never ending DAILY to do list. In the evening I move the 4 to 10 unfinished items from today’s list to tomorrow and then I try to remember all of the other things that need to be done, I go to bed anxious that I omitted something vital from my list. I get up the next morning and if all goes well I look at my list again and I typically think of 3 or 4 more things I forgot. Sometimes by the end of the day I have added even more items than I have checked off.
Not knowing what to do first, unable to assign a logical value to any of the items. I then become stuck, paralyzed, boggled, because what was going to be my handy dandy to do list has now grown to a size that a "normal" person would have trouble finishing in a day. I still feel guilty for not “checking off” all of the things on my list.
Just the sheer volume of items listed is enough to boggle me, but I do the same thing the next day and the next...
So, I have been trying to figure out why I do this. I have come up with this hypothesis; I think that I write everything on my list because I’m afraid that I will forget something. I am trying to approach this quandary as an outsider because some-times being to close, the solution is hard to see. There must be some way to write my stuff down so that I wont forget and still not boggle myself.
My brilliant plan:
Learn what is reasonable, by experimentation, try different lists out for size until I figure out what a manageable size for myself is.
- Have an alternate sheet for stuff that I remember needs to be done but can wait until another day.
- Learn what questions to ask my self, so that I can start to prioritize my tasks. (I will try to come up with a list for another blog.)
- Learn to be happy with my new down sized list, and celebrate my accomplishments not berating myself for not being able to handle the same load as Mrs. X.
- Develop the habit of checking my alternate list everyday to see if there is anything that I need to pay attention to ASAP.